Making the best out of Ms Rona... because staying positive is the way to go
So…because Singapore is on a Circuit Breaker, I guess that’s when I decided to not write anything. It has been such a crazy beginning of the year with Covid-19 cramming all our styles. If this did not happen, I would now actually be writing a piece on how much I love New York as I sip on a shitty cup of venti latte from Starbucks in Madison Avenue.
Ms Rona does not need any introduction to any of you, but the bigger question is, how has the lockdown been affecting you? I’m definitely one of the affected ones. As you know, I’m such a social animal that being isolated with no social interactions actually is annoying. Even working hours feel a lot longer as there is no clear break in the setting of your workplace. That said, I’m not looking at this in a negative light. If there is one thing you should know, I am a glass-half-full kind of guy so I make the best out of every situation, just because.
Besides panic shopping for totally unnecessary things (you’ll know if you follow me on Instagram), here are some conscious actions I make to ensure I continue to stay active and maintain strong mental health:
Keeping a workout routine, even if it’s at home
I’ve lost all those Dad bod and I’m not about to let a virus take that away (or rather give back to me). Keeping fit and healthy has become part and parcel of my personal priority. Despite the lockdown, I’m thankful for a personal trainer who personally follows through your routine and set goals with me. I’m also glad that there is so much online materials including companies like Down Dog that give out free usage during this difficult time. One can continue learning and practising your favorite yoga sessions at your own time, and at your own pace. I also schedule in at least 30 minutes of walks every day around the neighborhood to clock in some steps. More importantly, it’s something you can look forward to that is different from work.
Upping the culinary skills
Frankly, I’ve always enjoyed cooking, and I like eating pretty things. I’m often fascinated by people who can cook and make it aesthetically pleasing. I’ve been watching a lot of Gordon Ramsay and Nigella at the table, obviously. But hey, if you want to do something, do it well, am I right? I’ve signed up for Masterclass and I’ve been following a few healthy chefs on Youtube. So, check out some of these new foods (including some baking!) I’ve been making and testing out compositions and plating.
Breaking the script with close friends
I genuinely missed my friends and the times we can dress up and go out for a great time of food and banter. But who says you can’t do that with your friends, even if it means it goes off script a little. I threw a “Secret Dinner” session with the crew and mandated everyone to dress up. The rule though, I’ve assigned specific people to different friends and the task is to order and deliver food to the other person. Clearly, people were rambling about what the other person will like but give a tad bit of challenge to the process so they’d better work b*tch (queue Britney).
There are a few other things that I’ve embarked on, but that’s a story for another day. I choose to stay grateful and thankful for a homely place I can call home, good friends who deal with my bullshit virtually, and most importantly, health that I can still be sitting here writing this.
I hope you are staying engaged to people around you and keeping yourself busy by picking up a new skill or two. You can emerge out of this with new experiences and skills that will make you a lot more interesting as a person.
2010s, thank you for a spectacular decade
It’s the end of a decade, they say. Looking back at the last 10 years, there have been so many changes and all I see is progress, progress, and progress. Progress not only in your life but the way the world around us has evolved.
Personally, I’ve seen much growth, having gone through really exciting times and places I never thought I would be from a 20 year old to a 30 year old. A decade ago, I couldn’t even imagine going beyond Malaysia for vacation but through the last 10 years, I’ve seen much more of the world than I could ever imagine and that surely changes the perspectives in life. I thought I would work in Malaysia forever and live that preconceived idea of life but I have now lived and worked in different countries. Will Singapore be my final destination - who the hell knows?
That’s the funny part about life though, you can never plan the life events and circumstances but you can always hold true to your beliefs that will steer the course for you. I’ve held on to some of these principles and I’m constantly mindful of them every day of my life.
1 - “Seek first the Kingdom of God
…and HIs righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you” Matthew 6:33. The truth of the matter is, God holds my destiny in His hands. If He can send his son to die for me, he can hold my destiny and I’m sure He will set my path. If all I have to do is to put Him first and I get the desires of my heart, the overflowing blessings, and His joy, that’s exactly what I will do.
2 - Stay hungry, stay foolish
I don’t mean to strive to be poor or stupid, but really to keep the hunger in you to want to learn more, to explore more and to do more. The world is changing at such immense speed, you cannot possibly stop learning and the moment you stop learning, that’s when you’re dead. Always find the purpose in what you’re doing because that’s what drives you. If what you’re doing has no purpose, then stop doing it (don’t even consider, just stop).
3 - Focus on things that matter and embrace failure
If you have set clear goals and objectives on what you want to achieve, focus on actions that can help you achieve that. Don’t get distracted by other things, other people and set your eyes straight at the prize. If you have to look left and right on what other people are doing, you will surely be driven off course. You may be going on unchartered territories, you may have fear of failure but all you have to lose is time but learning from any failures is the start to a new success.
4 - Stop caring about what people think
Stay true to yourself and own your decisions. If you have to spend time getting upset over what people say and trying to change yourself for them, you are not spending enough time doing what matters. Remember, people will always have their opinions but at the end of the day, it boils down to what you’re doing about it. Sure, you may be wrong sometimes, but you have to remain true to what you believe.
5 - Be thankful, stay humble but be confident
You should celebrate and be confident about the successes you have achieved - big or small. Humility does not mean you have to negate your success - that’s false humility. It’s one thing to be proud of the achievements that will push you through to another level and another to be arrogant and arrogance is just gross.
I don’t think I can summarize all the achievements of 2019 but I do have my Instagram #BestNine as just the tip of the iceberg.
In the next decade, starting with 2020, I want to focus on things that matter - family and friends, community building and a more purposeful career.
What have you achieved this decade and what do you have in store for the next decade? I can’t wait to hear from you.
All I want for Christmas is You
Christmas is definitely the most wonderful time of the year - with good friends, amazing Christmas songs and decorations. It’s one of those festivities where you feel so happy and festive, you just want to keep singing. And this year, I’m particularly happy when Mariah’s “All I want for Christmas is You” made it to #1 after 25 years - a feat that no other artists have!
To celebrate that, thought I’d post a few nice Christmas shots I have from celebrations this year commemorating the beautiful decors and special moments with friends.
Dad bod be gone - Man boobs no more
Previously on Dad bod be gone, I told you about the three things my trainer suggested for change and how I thought they were ridiculous. Obviously the hard lesson I went through was the moment I pulled my muscles when I tried breathing in hard as I put on my pants before I went to work one day. (Okay, I used pulling muscles for dramatic effects).
Bottom line, I was still 79 kilos and one kilo away from becoming a delicious dumpling (a wanton at this point I’d say, like pretty but just smaller). This was the moment of realization that I need to live the values I believe in - be the change that you want to be!
I made the decision to get serious and officially kicked off the transformation journey with a specific goal together with Matt about 16 weeks back - become sub-70 kilos by Christmas. In response to the three ludicrous things he’s said, I made minor tweaks to keep things sustainable:
“I’ll only drink on Fridays and Saturdays”
…and keep to my skinny bitches
“I’ll only drink on Fridays and Saturdays” - I get invited to many social events and it often involves a glass of wine (or a bottle). On the weekends, I could easily do some eight G&Ts and still standing. Instead of cutting out my drinks entirely, I limit it to Fridays and Saturdays because I have a life! And instead of champagne and G&Ts, I switched over to skinny bitches (really, just vodka soda and lime). I hated it at first but I grew to enjoy it and it’s basically 96 calories and water.
“I’ll start meal prepping my breakfast and lunch/ dinner for the week” - I started researching on meal prep recipes and improvised them to fit my taste buds. They’re not only delicious, they’re also nutritional. I can’t wait to share some of the recipes in my next posts and you can be sure of a good balanced meal!
“I’ll slot in the fourth meal” - I thought this was totally crazy. I have to eat more to lose weight? Turns out, you can. I was hovering around 73-74 kilos at one point but as soon as I start slotting in that fourth meal, it went down faster than I thought.
Of course, this all comes with proper training and workout with my trusted trainer, Matt. I train at least three times a week and it’s great to see my strength increasing every time I train. Today’s Christmas and I’m hovering around 68 kilos, losing a total of 10 kilos in 16 weeks and most importantly, I can fit back into that pants that gave me that muscle pull. Fun fact, I used to think I have Gynaecomastia and thought I needed surgery to get rid of my man boobs but I guess it’s sorted now.
Through this, as with any successes in life, I believe you can achieve anything if you set clear objectives and make changes to your life. Ultimately, it all depends on you and your will power to make things happen.
Eternally grateful for the progress made in Phase 1. I’m ready for Phase 2 in 2020! Watch this space.
Dad bod be gone - Resisting change
I was invited to join Matt Benfell (then hated trainer, now friend) to meet him for a consultation and workout session to set some objectives and aspirations. I thought I was making okay money to use it as a form of motivation to get that transformation - forcing myself to go workout because I paid for it. In my line of work and my social life, basically keeping in shape is almost impossible, or so I thought.
In my mind, I had these amazing images in my head with 6-packs and toned arms that I can get in a short period of time. As with any transformation, there will always be a series of changes that need to happen and I, of all people, as a transformation expert (admittedly a strong one in work context) should understand this.
Little did I know, subconsciously I was resisting that change like anyone going through that phase would and I’m not proud of it. Here’s how I looked, as you would agree, it’s perfect for Coachella.
Having a 79 kilo dad bod
Let me start you off with the three things Matt told me which I happily scoffed at but played along.
1 - You need to cut down on your booze, particularly wine, champagne and gin & tonics…
“So…you’re asking me to just drink water?” was the first statement I made. Also, if you knew me, champagne is my absolute favorite drink. Cutting on it is a no-go. I thought he was ludicrous for even suggesting such change, it’s almost laughable. As I thought about how funny it was, I was sipping champagne off my glass.
2 - You need to introduce breakfast to your diet
I get it! According to Kellogg’s, breakfast is the most important meal of the day (says no one ever). I don’t have time for breakfast. All I can do is a cup of coffee in the morning so it gets me going and I barely have time for lunch at my desk. Also, isn’t eating more just going to make me fatter, I need to be on a deficit? Anyway, I promised I’ll try to have some breakfast when I can.
3 - Try to slot in more veggies and proteins and start recording what you eat so you keep to your calorie count
Okay Matt, I’m not about that. I am at best an omnivore, at worst, a carnivore (sweet and sour pork for lyfe!). The only thing I did was to have more salads from Workspace when I’m in the city but it will be impossible for me to have that if I’m at my other office.
“It’s too hard, I’ll try my best” is all I said and I was determined to go to the gym more. I remember the times where I often turn up half an hour late, cancelling last minute and being absolutely pissed at how I’m asked to do some crazy ass workouts after a long day of work.
As a result, even after 2 months, dad bod remains…
As a point of reflection, change does not come without resistance. If I applied what I preach at work, I should really be the change, embrace the change instead of being forced to change - that’s when you will gain success. Stay tuned to see what I did after a moment of realization.
Is blogging an outdated trend?
The intent to revive blogging.
I used to spend a lot of time blogging and writing about everything when I was younger (blogspot, myspace anyone?). It was such a time consuming activity and after awhile you start questioning the intent of the blog - are you sharing life or just blabbering about your life. So, I stopped.
I’ve been going through my Instagram feed over the last few years and realized that I’ve gone through so many different types of experiences that while a picture may worth a thousand words, there’s nothing as powerful as a good documentation of the powerful moments you encounter.
Plus, I’ve always loved writing anyway. I hope you’ll run along this adventure with me and also share your greatest experiences because I want to learn and that’s how we continue building diversity.
So, in short, is blogging an outdated trend? Maybe, but I don’t give a damn.